The most frequently asked questions about sex

By Jane Smith on 1st Jan 2020

According to a variety of sources, these are some of the most frequently asked questions about sex online.

Does ‘size’ really matter?
According to research one-third of women who frequently have vaginal orgasms claim they’re more likely to get off when the man is well endowed. But in reality, it’s more about technique than size.

How can I last longer in bed?
There are kinds of aids and creams that might help. But similar to the ‘size’ question duration of sex is just another overrated marker of how good you are at sex. So while you may feel pressured to last for hours on end, she’s not expecting it. A survey of sex therapists in 2008 revealed: ’too short’ was 1-2 minutes, ‘adequate’ was 3-7 minutes, ‘desirable’ was 7-13 minutes and ‘too long’ was around 30 minutes. These numbers exclude foreplay. So again, worry less, and enjoy more. It’s more about quality time than the amount of time.

How can I get my wife to be more adventurous in bed?
Exploration is a two-way street, if you’re not going out of your way to romance your wife, it makes sense that things have become stagnant. If you want to show her that you’re just as committed to spicing things up, buy something crazy online—like a vibrator, blindfold, or handcuffs. Not into toys? Pick up a copy of the Kama Sutra and start working your way through. The goal here is simple: Step outside your normal routine to try new things.

How long does it take to get pregnant after sex?
‘Plan B’, or the morning after pill, can prevent an unwanted pregnancy for up to five days after intercourse, but that it is most effective when taken immediately. Without Plan B, if you have unprotected sex and are ovulating, conception probably takes place within 48 hours; but since your cervix stores sperm and releases it for about 48 hours after sex you could actually conceive four days after sex.

Does birth control really affect your sex drive?
It varies a lot from woman to woman. Some see absolutely no effect, and others experience strong side effects that completely diminish their desire for sex. Go to your healthcare provider and discuss trying another type of pill. You may find a brand or combination that doesn’t make your libido lag.

Is a cold sore the same as herpes?
Cold sores don’t carry the same stigma as genital herpes. But strains of the same herpes simplex virus cause cold sores on the lips (and face, chest, even the fingers), as well as blisters around genitals. About 50%-80% of American adults have oral herpes; 20% have genital herpes. But you can get either virus in either area through oral-genital contact. Both can be treated with antiviral medications. But neither is curable.

Why am I bored by sex, even though I love my partner?
Ironically, the couples that are the closest are the most likely to suffer loss of desire. Lust thrives on danger, eroticism, the unknown – things that make us feel uncomfortable. It’s hard to maintain both and because we spend more time hanging out together than we do having sex. Do the same thing all the time, like most couples do, and of course you will be bored. Remember the kind of sex you had at the start that you both loved, try and re create that?

We have mismatched libidos. How we can we change that?
Couples often don’t find out just how different their libidos are for about a year because new sex artificially inflates the lower sex drive person’s desire for sex. Fixing differing sex drives generally involves coming up with some sort of compromise over how often and how long you have sex. Try putting a time limit on it, it increases intensity. Adding some sex toys can also help things enormously if the low sex drive person is female.

Courtesy of: For more non-judgemental, practical advice about sex, visit and for her range of products.

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